Axioo: Yosep Sugiarto
Sep 26, 2019    |   By Yosep
Heart and Soul
courtesy of Patrick & Florencia

Marriage is a commitment, and commitment is something we put our hearts and souls into.


And when we put our souls into something, we invest much of our energy and determination into it.


We rarely pay attention to our souls, yet we don’t realise that it’s our souls that we bring into our marriages. The soul is what underlies every response and every choice we make in our relationships. What we often do is we silence our souls in order to put a smile on the faces of our loved ones. We avoid conflict by hiding what we truly feel or desire.


But, the truth is, when our souls are cast down, it reflects outwardly. Instead of getting into an argument, we get into something like a cold war — we become emotionally distant, isolated, or ignorant.


“It is only out of a healthy soul that we can build a healthy marriage.” – Gary Thomas


What does a healthy soul look like? A healthy soul isn’t afraid of intimacy, it finds peace in the midst of chaos. A healthy soul looks inward instead of blaming the other, always seeking to improve oneself instead of trying to control the other. A healthy soul forgives, instead of putting all their problems on a shelf and forget them.


Healthy souls lead to healthy marriages. When we decide to nurture our souls, we are actually nurturing our relationships, too. When we choose to guard our hearts, we are choosing to pay attention to what flows out of our lives, deliberately choosing what we bring to our marriages.


In order for us to commit ourselves to another person, to put our hearts and souls into someone, we need to find that inner peace that exceeds all understanding, so that our souls can hardly be affected by outside circumstances — so that our souls remain beautiful, healthy, and vibrant, as they are meant to be.


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